8 Things About Virgo Men You Probably Don’t Know

Okay folks, today I’m going to take a slightly different tack than usual.  Being a Virgo and a male, I have seen a TON of websites devoted to the mistakes and predilections of other signs but, having dealt with some issues of my own in recent weeks, months and years, I’ve chosen to “lay it on the line” for the Virgo men and, of course, those who are either THINKING about dating a Virgo man (very important info you will want to read here, trust me) or are already in a relationship with a Virgo man (be prepared to laugh your ass off at some of this).  Yes, much self-deprecating humor is involved, as usual.  Here are Seven Things Virgo Men Need to be Aware Of About Ourselves:

  1. We spent entirely too much time in our heads.

Ladies (and gentlemen), every wonder why the hell your Virgo male friend (or lover) seems to be looking like he’s about to split in two as the result of some bizarre particle collision?  It’s because he’s too busy considering all the goddamned possibilities and talking to every single person he can get the opinion of (swearing them to confidentiality in the process, by the way) before finally making that decision.  Of course, when he does actually make a decision – usually rushing headlong into it without thinking about the consequences, mainly because he’s fucking exhausted – he spends the next six months agonizing over why, why, why did he do it in the first place?  Speaking from experience:  Virgo men, let’s get out of our damned heads and take a look at our hearts.  You might be surprised how much wisdom is actually in there!

  1. Nobody is perfect, especially in relationships

Let’s face facts:  we all get heartbroken a time or two.  Virgo men are the Bachelors of the Zodiac (unless dumb enough to get married – more on THAT later) for a reason; we have a standard of perfection in a mate that nobody can achieve and when we do finally find that person, guess what?  Ain’t happening!  Shocker!  Now for a little nurturing (since Virgo men need the occasional head pat from time to time):  it’s nothing you did wrong as much as what you aren’t understanding – you can’t script life!  Love happens when, how and as it’s supposed to (yes, I know, pot and the kettle on my end – no lie!)  Things happen the way they should – Virgo men can benefit from learning how to relax, loosen up and just go with the flow.  Easy?  Fuck no!  Lifesaving???  You have no earthly idea!

  1. The world won’t end tomorrow and, even it does, what can we do about it?

My dad is a Sagittarius (yes, I know…I was screwed from the jump!) so me being his son, he’d totally laugh at this:  you’re friend watches a news story about a meteor coming this way and he has to verify the source, go to Snopes, and check out a billion conspiracy theory websites!  Yes, we are the eternal skeptic, but we are also nervous nellies from hell!  I swear to Christ, Niles Cranes is a damned Virgo!  I myself am a Virgo with a Virgo ascendant, so I’m doubly boned in that regard!  I used to have panic attacks about stuff Nostradamus predicted would happen in the year 4000!  Come on, if that’s not Virgoan panic, I don’t know what is!  My advice:  deep breaths and a really stiff drink.

  1. Virgo men can be The. Biggest. Attention. Whores. PERIOD!

When a Virgo male is having a rough patch, he will do anything and everything to get the attention of his friends.  Unlike Leo, who thrives on attention by nature, and Aquarius, who are natural social butterflies, the Virgo’s attention-demanding behaviors stem from deep-seat issues, usually some sort of emotional need, which was never found early in life.  This isn’t to say that Virgo isn’t capable of attaining a level of self-love which can help mitigate this but, unless he has a  Sag, Scorp or Leo bestie who wouldn’t hesitate to bitch-slap him a few times, there is almost nobody out there capable of stopping a Virgo male when he is full-out self-critic and meltdown mode.  We simply are like runaway nuclear detonations.  Best advice to anyone who knows a Virgo in this state – be there with kind words, an understanding ear, and patience.  Otherwise, get the hell out of the way!

  1. We’ve got notoriously bad tempers.

While Virgo is ruled by Mercury, our “technical” ruler is the thunder god Vulcan (save the Spock jokes, alright?).  Because of this, we have extremely explosive tempers, though we keep them in check using every last ounce of strength we have.  When we finally do pop our tops, it can be very, very, very bad.  Again, when this happens, get the hell out of the way!  The lone upside to this is when a Virgo blows his stack, it usually clears the way for something really cool later – like a new relationship, a great new job, or Virgo realizing something about himself which helps him hit that next stage in life.  Just an FYI;  Depression is almost ALWAYS followed by an emotional explosion, and they can last for weeks!  My advice to my fellow Virgos – when you feel the volcano erupting, go to a safe place you can wreck some stuff you don’t need, or figure out a very productive physical activity which can calm you down.  Nothing, and I repeat nothing, can prepare most people for the explosiveness of the Virgo male temper.

  1. We absolutely need boundaries in relationships

A Virgo male is best suited in a life with structure, and relationships are no exception. Marriage is the one area where Virgos are celebrated failures because it is so difficult for a marriage to have boundaries.  Virgo men are ridiculously tight-lipped about their emotions until they have the aforementioned emotional meltdown, and then the gloves come off.  When boundaries and rules in ANY relationships (especially marriages and friends) are established, then a Virgo is able to keep those boundaries almost without fail.  If a friend says “we don’t talk about this,” or “I don’t want to hear about that,” you can bet Virgo will ask permission three times before talking about it.  If Virgo makes that rule, you best not break it, or its game over.  We Virgo males can tolerate a lot of things, but breaking the rules because you think they don’t apply to you isn’t one of them.  Our stilted sense of fairness DOES come in handy that way – Virgos aren’t doormats, as much as we might be highly agreeable.

  1. A Virgo male will usually get married more than once for a reason – we aren’t good at find the right partner. When we do find “Ms. Right,” HOLY HELL!

Virgo men are historically lousy at finding at finding the right partner.  We can go on for years pining for someone who isn’t the right fit, or isn’t interested.  It’s just our way – there’s no rhyme or reason to it, it just is.  That said, we tend to get involved in codependent relationships very easily, and they tend to turn bad quickly, and it’s very hard for us to get out!  A Virgo male will sacrifice his own identity to save a relationship if he thinks there is hope, but if he managed to establish a boundary during the course of rebuilding, that’s a built-in escape button he can push mentally.  Hit that button, and he will be a “good boy” but ultimately will find the door.  Now, that said, here’s some hope for Virgo men – we do, more often than not, find Ms. Right later in life.  Sometimes its someone we knew all along, sometimes its someone who came out of the blue.  Either way, it almost always, without fail, happens when we step out of our own heads, open our hearts, and learn to love ourselves, set boundaries, take no shit from anyone, and begin to live as the men we are, rather than what everyone wants us to be.  We are people pleasers, and when we please ourselves first, we create the environment for magical things to happen faster than almost any other sign for one reason – we are relentless!

And Finally….

  1. Virgo is the one sign you can take to the bank from a friendship and caring standpoint.

It’s hard to imagine, but Virgo men are the most steadfast, loyal, and downright committed friends there are.  They may not always show their feelings, they may get jilted by that lady friend they develop a crush on, and they may feel like the entire world is aligned against them but make no mistake.  When the chips are down, when it all falls apart on you, and when you are absolutely at the end of your rope and the one friend you haven’t reached out to is your Virgo male (even if you violated a boundary – in times of crisis we do tend to forgive), send that message, make that call!  You will be astonished at how quickly old hurts go away, the caring and compassion ramp up like it was just yesterday, and you see his truly loving side come out.  We Virgo men are a lot of things; neat-freaks, freaks in bed, crazy ass obsessive compulsives, and downright nitpickers, but there is one thing we absolutely are when it comes to our friends and those we care about most – loyal.  When your Aries is butting heads with you over opinion, your Aquarian is telling you to go with the flow, and your Leo is turning it around back on them, Virgo will listen, give SOLID ADVICE (not some platitude), and not hesitate to jump in and get our hands dirty.  We were built for service, and nothing is higher to use and than serving our friends and loved ones.

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