Random thoughts for March

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Just kind of sitting here, at my table, sipping on a coffee and unwinding from a long week, waiting for a new week to start, and these thoughts just come flooding through my head:

  • Dems and Repubs are the cut from the same knee-jerk, reactionary mold.  It’s just one sides believes in the money trickling down from the top, the other believes it should bubble up from the bottom. The sad part is that it’s rather hard to tell which side is for which these days.
  • Vladimir Putin is being courted by Republican leaders today, while Democrats are lambasting the invasion of Crimea.  Perhaps this is the ballyhooed “polar flip” the Mayans talked about.  If so, 2 years late, fellas!
  • A friend of mine once postulated the theory that if cats were to figure out how to work a can opener, humanity would cease to exist!
  • After reading the story about the LSD-tainted meat in Tampa, the first thing that came to mind is someone at a meat packing plant is in deep doo-doo with a drug cartel.
  • If Walmart was to merge with Target and then with Filene’s, it would create the most awesome NYSE stock symbol ever:  WTF
  • Shout out to Bill Engvall:  I purchased a bag of cat treats with a flavor of….wait for it….Free Range Chicken.
  • The soap opera Days of Our LIves has run over 12,000 episodes and has had plenty of dopey moments, but the extremely short-lived soap Passions held the record for lamest moment in soap history, when one of the stars actually sang the show’s theme song as part of a scene.
  • Latin proverb which appears to be all to true these days:  No one gets rich quickly if he is honest.
  • We live in an age where we put a man on the moon, but we can’t surmount petty differences born of skin color?
  • “Twerk” sounds a LOT like “twerp.”
  • God must have a sense of humor.  Seriously, giving us the mind behind the “Condescending Wonka” meme?
  • Two journalists who should never be allowed to talk “street”:  Katie Couric and Brian Williams.
  • When a computer-animated talking dog does a fist bump, THAT particular greeting has officially jumped the shark!
  • When people on MSNBC are using “jump the shark,” THAT phrase has jumped the shark!
  • Beware of today’s milk jugs – one wrong drop, and the floor is flooded with Quality Liquid Dairy Product.
  • Florida Proverb:  Man who attempts to kill palmetto bug better use atomic weapons.
  • The events behind my novel “A 38 Day Education” began 20 years ago and, in that time, I realized that during that period of my I didn’t drink a single drop of coffee!
  • And with that, I am completely out of material!

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